Monday, August 03, 2009

I'm changing my name

It happens. I'm not sure exactly why but it eventually happens to all of us.

My husband and I go to Wal-Mart about once a week for some groceries. When I go alone, I always check the row I parked in. I need to or when I come out and look over that sea of cars, I never remember where I left it in my rush to get to shopping.

Last week as we walked through the doors, I asked Curt if he had noted the row number. "Why do you need to know?" he asked. "I know where we parked."

"In case something happens to you. I don't want to be wandering for hours."

He rolled his eyes. "Row seven."

I let out my breath and focused on the tomatoes.

An hour later we left the store with a cart full of food. He veered toward row twelve.

"Wait! You said we were parked in seven. Why did you tell me that?"

He smiled much like he always does when he thinks something he did was humorous. "Made you feel better though, didn't it?"

He was right. I needed to know a number--any number--to make me feel better, to make me less worried. to make me feel like I had everything under control. And it didn't take all that much.

So where am I going with this story? That I'm old and can't remember where I parked? No, even though that might be true.

It hit me that I was putting my fears in a number, a fact.

Yesterday I heard a sermon about Phillip, the disciple, and how he was always counting the costs. He needed all the facts to make a decision, to make him feel safe with an answer or situation. He told Jesus it would be impossible to feed the five thousand.

I don't want to be a Phillip anymore. I want to believe in the miracles. Do you?

33 comments:

Stephanie Faris said...

I'm always losing my car too! But he's right, we put our fear in not knowing...just THINKING you knew gave you the comfort to get through.

Lin said...

Fun story about your car-do you have those panic buttons that many push to make their cars beep so they can find them in large car lots? I've done that before...

Warren Baldwin said...

"I want to believe in the miracles. Do you?"

Yes, I do. For our country. For our church. Not so much a miracle, perhaps, as God's presence and work in the everyday and ordinary. Of course, I believe he is already at work in ways we can't see. Perhpas sometimes I long for a bit more visible evidence?

Andrea said...

Me, too! Let's believe and watch for miracles together.

Blessings and prayers, andrea

Trudy said...

Absolutely. What a great post. It's easy to see the miracles happening in other people's lives but when it comes to trusting God to perform them in our own, I know I tend to falter horribly.

Robin @ Be Still and Know said...

I always park right next to the shopping cart corrals. Then I have two visible markers (it's the DD job to remember what our isle number is!!!)to help my fading memory, plus I then don't have to walk a long way to put up my shopping cart.

Susan J. Reinhardt said...

Hi Terri -

I can't tell you how many times I come out of a store and have a moment of panic. Since I don't like that feeling, I try to get some kind of landmark. (I'm parked in the row facing the word, "Walmart.")

Plenty of miracles in this girl's life, but I'd rather live in the blessing. Miracles mean I'm in a crisis situation, while Scripture tells me blessings will chase me down and overtake me. :) Hence, why I almost always sign off --

Blessings,
Susan

Eileen Astels Watson said...

I'm with you, Terri. It's weird what little things seem to disperse our fear, isn't it? When really we need only look to Him for the very same effect!

Melissa Marsh said...

Another great post, Terri. And I'd say your husband knows you VERY well! ;-)

Katie Ganshert said...

What a good (and smart) hubby! I usually like to know everything too. I'm working on that thing called childlike faith. Letting go, and letting God. :)

Lazy Writer said...

Lovely post, Terri! I so want to believe in miracles.

Cindy said...

Wonderful post. I see a lot of myself in it, how I try to control things with the need to know. With facts. I definitely want to believe in miracles. I agree with what Trudy said above. It's easier to trust for them in other peoples lives than in our own.

Nancy said...

Terri - I do believe in miracles. But I need to know where my car is parked. I don't want a rehash of Alive in Wonderland, looking dazedly at a sea of whatever color car I happen to be driving and wondering which is mine.

Isn't it funny that whatever color car you have, so does everyone else?

Jessica said...

LOL! I lose my car but I'm not averse to wandering a bit. Heehee. So are you saying you're a little bit of a *gasp* control-freak? :-) I say that with a smile, I promise.
This is a great post. It's good to be prepared and responsible, but not to where we put our trust in the wrong things (ourselves)
;-) Sounds like you have a funny husband!

Donna M. Kohlstrom said...

Why don't they let you reserve your own space so that every time you shop at the same store you know where your car is??? I believe that every other car in the parking lot is ours because it is the same model and color. I've even embarrassed myself by trying to get in someone else's car while the owner stood next to it and watched me. DUH!

And yes. I believe in miracles. My whole life story is about miracles.

Greg C said...

I did the same thing just yesterday and it was in a small parking lot. I started out of the store in the wrong direction and my son asked where I was going. I too focus too much on numbers. I just need to chill out. Thanks again for all the nice comments and for sending your friends my way. You are the best.

Jody Hedlund said...

What an encouraging post, Tiffany! When I read your title, I thought maybe you were considering a pen name! ;) But I think that we all can work on changing our fears, or at least not let them stop us from great things!

Galen Kindley--Author said...

Nice story, Terri. I do believe in miracles. One happens every time I DO find the car in the parking lot. This story was so me.

Best Regards, Galen
Imagineering Fiction Blog

Alleluiabelle said...

My Dear Friend,

I absolutely believe in miracles and nothing less than that. I always will...whatever His will shall be.

I love you sweet friend. I loved this post. It certainly hit home with me. I can't remember where I parked my car either unless I look for a row, a number. LOL

Blessings & Prayers,
Alleluiabelle

T. Anne said...

Thank goodness He's on the throne and really in charge or I would have a massive panic attack over much smaller issues. I hate when I can't find my car.

Janna Qualman said...

I do want to believe in the miracles. I have to.

LisaShaw said...

Great message Terri! I agree with Warren.

Blessings dear friend.

Jeanette Levellie said...

Oh, yes, Terri! Let's quit settling for ordinary. Let's expect miracles every day!
Thanks for encouraging us,
Jen

Jill Kemerer said...

I'm so much like you. And Philip. Thanks for the reminder.

Carmen said...

Great post Terri! We are such fearful creatures much of the time. I usually make a mental note where I've parked...and even then I'm hit with a bit of panic when I leave the store because now I have to remember what my mental note was. Sigh...

KelliGirl said...

Hi Terri,
I haven't been by for a while...to any blogs in fact, but it's great to catch up with you here. Your blog is a breath of fresh air.
Someday I'm going to learn how to write shorter posts that pack a big punch like you do! It takes me 300 words to get started. Sigh.

I'm not at the fear stage of my life yet, but I can certainly appreciate being able to hang onto a handy fact as a security blanket.

My parents just got back from a Habitat build site in Ohio as part of their RV group. It sounded like a fabulous experience...good for your husband for jumping in.

Beth in NC said...

Yes, I do believe in miracles. I have been the recipient of several myself.

Now cars ... I always try to park in front of a door so I can find my vehicle fairly easy. :o)

Kathryn Magendie said...

I'm not sure about "miracles" -but I do believe in things happening that are extraordinary!

I get lost sometimes like that too - I really have to concentrate to pay attention to my surroundings - yes, writers are said to "pay extra attention to surroundings" but that's not true for me - I am "hyper aware" of things - but not "concrete" things necessarily -- more like I am hyper-aware of the sensory, or a piece of something: someone's tic or smile or frown or look in eye or some action or some color or something shiny *laugh*

I am the raccoon of the literary world...picking up shiny things that attract my attenion *laugh*

LauraLee Shaw said...

Awesome, awesome, Awesome. Does your husband have a degree in psychology? What an effective example of trusting and believing.

Pat's Place said...

And so, what is your new name???

Tea With Tiffany said...

Me too. I want to believe in miracles. Actually I JUST printed out the first downloadable pages of Bruce Wilkinson's book. I think the title is You Were Born for Miracles.

Isn't God something?

sarah said...

I learned to just hit the car alarm. But like you I want to believe in miracles. I want to trust God that even if I forget whatever, He will bring some sort of miracle out of it. Sarah

Cheryl Wright said...

That's me Terri - Ms. Count The Cost - Must Know All The Facts - Cover all The bases.

I accept that it is an attempt to control or rather, feel in control.

Thanks for the reminder to stay open for the miracles: God's provision, God's perfect time, God's sustenance, God's protection, God's will, just God.

After all, in the grand scheme of life, no matter what we do or what we know, God is in control.