Thinking about what I've been doing

Every time I release a new book, the same old doubts resurface. Why am I writing? The marketing is getting harder and harder and if you don't push your book, no one finds it. I think this past fall, I over did it. I was writing many words a day and had this big plan to rapid release a few romance books while my next suspense simmers in my mind.

What happened? I shut it all down. My first romance didn't garner that many reviews which I need, and I am so over begging readers to leave a comment--good or bad. But I'd written my newest book, Sunshine, and really found I liked it more than Mandy.

So I committed to releasing it.

It's up for pre-order but my heart wonders if I have what it takes anymore to get it in the hands of people who might enjoy it.

Gone are the days when a writer could write, give the book to a publisher and agent and they do all the work. I've been with a publishing house and self-published and today the writer must wear all the hats.

Maybe I'm due for a long rest.

Maybe my next book should be it.

I hate giving away my books or reducing the price to some ridiculous amount anymore. I work hard on my books and like any profession, we are due a decent wage. But to use many of the advertising platforms out there, you must do that. Do they work? Sometimes yes. Sometimes no.

Every writer knows they can't stop writing. I certainly do. I love the art of creating something from nothing. But I also need to look at the bigger picture. Is selling a thousand or so books worth the aggravation anymore?

Most people would say yes it is. Getting your book into that one reader's hands is worth it.

Then how does one stop the self-doubt? The insecurities and the burnout?

This post is an honest review of where I'm at right now. Good or bad, I need prayer to figure out my next step with my writing.

It's been a long run and maybe, maybe God has something else planned for me.